Golfers are mental masochists

Discussion

December 5, 2009

By Ray Sarno The Huntsville Item Sat Dec 05, 2009, 11:48 PM CST

The majority of sports today require both the participant and the spectator to have masochistic tendencies.

Spectators want action. They do not want to watch a boxing match with two powder-puff punchers. They want to see someone get their block knocked off.

They go to car races to see the spectacular crashes. This is the case in nearly all so-called contact sports.

Some youngsters get into contact sports to impress someone of the opposite sex. It is not that they enjoy getting beat around, but it seemed that was the best way to impress the young lady.

When I was in school, I had a basketball injury and had to walk around with crutches for a couple of weeks. I was a hero, but I missed my Senior Prom, and someone else took my girl.

Golf and golfers are different. They do not go out with the intention of hurting anyone physically, although I do not advise you to agitate one after a bad round. They go out to face mental anguish.

Professionals who play golf for a living are exposed on TV, and their actions have resulted in new rules and fines for temper outbursts. There have instances many years ago concerning habitual violators.

Terrible Tommy Bolt was one, but the king of the all was W. A. “Lefty” Stackhouse. He played in a tournament on one occasion when he was not having a good day, and he lived up to his reputation.

Stackhouse used to love to gamble, and one time he was in a little money match and losing. He went mad and started beating his head against some rocks.

He stopped momentarily and reached into his back pocket and took out his wallet. He threw the wallet on the ground and told the guys he was playing with to take out what he owed them in case he killed himself, and then went back to beating his head against the rock.

Tommy Bolt is well remembered for the picture taken of him at the U.S. Open one year when he was giving his driver some air time. He used to advocate always throwing your club ahead of you, so that you did not have to use up any energy going back to pick it up.

I once knew this man who would go wild at times and he would have spontaneous fits of temper and could be dangerous. We stopped him by making a rule that the first time he threw a club he would have to pay off all bets.

He used a pull cart, and one day he was chipping to a green, and he chili-dipped his chip shot. He turned around and tried to spear his club into his bag, but missed. He tried it three times, and missed each time.

Finally, he picked up the bag and cart and threw them over a fence.

Another player I once knew was the nicest, most gentle person in the world, away from the golf course. He had a Jekyll and Hyde personality and I had once seen him have three clubs in the air at the same time.

One day we were coming back from playing in a pro-am. On the way there, we saw this nice little house nestled in the trees and a for-sale sign in the front.

He said that he wanted to stop and check that house out on the way home. He did not have a very good day and was in a sour mood when we stopped to look at the house.

The owner showed us through the house, and when he told my friend the price, which was very high, my friend said, “You have showed us the barn, now where is the house?”

Lastly, to show how golf can sometimes mess with our minds, I remember late one afternoon I noticed a player sitting and drinking a soda after he finished his round.

He sat there for a long time and finally he got up to go home, and said to me, “If my wife don’t have my supper ready when I get there, I am going to beat the fire out of her. If she does have it ready, I ain’t gonna eat it.”

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Elkins Lake Golf Report

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